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Hesed

When she went into hospice, Naomi began a newsletter to her friends with her son Joshua. This is the seventh issue.

NOTES FROM ABOVE GROUND #7: HESED

The world stands on three things, sing and say the Jewish sages. This canonic statement of the three pillars of Judaism is attributed to Simon the Righteous, “remnant of the Great Assembly,” in Pirke Avot 1.2. Torah, Avodah, Gemilut Hasidim: Torah (Study of how to live and be.) Worship (prayer). Gemilut Hasadim (the doing of deeds of righteousness or “deeds of human kindness.”)

In the Jewish system of thought, study is talking, about halacha, translated as law, or, more idiomatically, the way to go, the path. Statements become codified and analyzed.

Jews also learn “how to go” from reading and endlessly revisiting stories. The less-learned person talks about the stories. How Rabbi so and so reacted when . . . what happened to the jealous husband. To the wife who could no longer tolerate her husband’s failure to come home from his yeshivah to perform his conjugal duties.

Who is right in human interaction? What justifies? How should we adjust the law to serve human needs?

That’s how Jewish ethics works in practice.

Let us consider the iconic status of Rivka, chosen by Abraham’s marriage-maker to be the bride of Abraham’s son Isaac. “Let the maiden to whom I say, ‘Please, lower your jar that I may drink,’ and who replies, ‘Drink, and I will also water your camels’—let her be the one whom You have decreed for Your servant Isaac. Thereby shall I know that You have dealt graciously with my master.” And Rivka ran to water the camels.

Was Rifka responding to the text she had just studied on putting the needs of others, even dumb animals, before one’s own? Was she weighing in her mind what proper behavior would be when a stranger heaved into view with tired livestock? Was camel-watering on her list of righteous deeds?

Rifka saw, and Rivka acted. Rivka was impelled forward by the simple motion of her heart. She is known as the embodiment of Hesed, the loving-kindness that one could say redeems our world. It is pure, spontaneous, instantaneous.

The sages probably knew at least a good bit about Hesed, but they couched their ethics in the language closer to study and analysis, categories, rules or at least guidelines for behavior. The magical “three things” come down to us as categories of analysis. “The doing of righteousness,” offers a protective bumper for spreading love and goodness.

It is good to understand. Often we need to do uncomfortable things like weigh competing needs for kind treatment, for justice. We need to think things through.

But if we are without the fundamental impulse to rush to aid the needy, to express our love for fellow human beings, who are we? That is the globe-bending question in our angry, frightened world today. (Equally, in the angry, frightened world of Cain and Abel, let’s note.)

When younger, I do believe I indulged in a fair amount of Hesed. I felt, basically, like a kind person. But I was also governed by the need to weigh and measure. I was fairly tightly locked into the analyzing box, warnings, don’t forget that bad things can come of good deeds. Watch out. Think before you act. Make sure your good intentions don’t have bad consequences.

Entering the hospice stage of life has changed me, the inner me. Nothing to lose? Caution to the winds? Or a simple freedom of heart I had lacked? I don’t know. I’m not going to analyze, only remark on how liberating it feels to let love well up. Even more so to recognize and allow the love coming at me from so many people, so much goodness, so much Hesed. I am amazed. Again, my cup runneth over.

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